Get ‘Em Tiger!

“It’s been a long time! I shouldn’t've left you….”

Indeed, it’s been a minute since my last post! So long so, I have to start off by saying, “Happy New Year!!!” And it’s damn near the middle of February! How pathetic is that!?! In any case, I’m back and I don’t plan on leaving you again any time soon. And now with that out of the way, on to the post….

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The Gregorian New Year started 40 days ago but the Traditional Chinese New Year doesn’t start until Sunday, February 14th. As you must know by now, according to the Chinese zodiac this is – and will be soon in China – the year of the tiger! Tiger years are often described as being a time of great personal and social upheaval. But for the brave and the strong, this is the time to show courage, to summon great inner strength and rebelliously throw the things and ideas that have held you back. In short, it’s a time of personal revolution.

So I ask you what are your goals for 2010? What is your personal revolution?

2009 Kanji of the Year

It’s that time again!!!

Japan Today reports that the Japan Kanji Aptitude Testing Foundation has conducted it’s annual Kanji of the Year survery. And in a public opinion to find of which single character out of the 3,000 over so Chinese characters used in standard Japanese best represents and reflects the events of the past year, voters selected 新 [shin - new] as this year’s character.

With a new prime minister, new American president, and a “new flu”, 2009 has been a year of new things in both Japan and the that mystical land, known here affectionately as, 外国 [gaikoku - foreign country]. The announcement was made in Kyoto, with a priest at the famed Kiyomizu Temple ceremoniously writing the character on traditional Japanese paper. Ironically enough, the announcement was presided over by the new president of the foundation as the last was arrested for mispropriety. How’s that for “new”?

Anyway, it may be the Kanji of the Year for 2009, but I’m co-opting it for 2010. See, 2010 is a new year, one filled with endless possibilities to start over, do it better and get it right!  Here’s to 新!!!

The Tree is Always Taller…

I was just a 8 year-old tiny-tot-for-Christ when I got my first hair…. you know, down there! It was a cute novelty that set me apart from most other boys my age. I know because I looked! LOL But as that single stalk became a wild field, the novelty of it all wore off kinda quick. One thought came to mind: MUST. CONTROL . THE. HAIR! And with that I lathered myself down with shaving cream and shaved for the first time. That was over 15 years ago!

I gave up shaving maybe right after that first time. Itchy crotch is just not a good look, ya know! But make no mistake I abhor body hair. And no matter how busy I am, or how much I errr, let myself go, I always make sure I’m properly trimmed. I call it “manscaping”. And I personally consider it an essential grooming habit for every man, woman and wolf child. It looks cleaner but most importantly it smells cleaner. I kid you not!

In the City Under Red Sun, I’ve had the opportunity to see a great many ummm, bushes- male and female. (Don’t ask! LMAO) When I say “bush” here, I really mean bush because unlike the “love nests” which I’m most familiar with, the Natives have something straight and pointy resembling the quills of a porcupine. It’s menacing to say the least! And with the same sharpness as porcupine quills, it can be downright dangerous should one ummmm, ever come in contact.

I know it’s cultural thing, with some people preferring that au natural look and feel and smell (gross!!!). But at the risk of offending those delicate cultural differences, I think that EVERYONE EVERYWHERE should at the very least “trim it up”. For starters, no one likes a mouthful of hair! LOL For you ladies that like “special attention”, imagine how much more special that attention will be once baby boy can find “it” without being attacked by it… coming up all scratched in the face!  But for my fellas, my beloved fellas, there’s another reason. Natives, Residents and guys all over the world, know this: The Tree is always taller when the grass is cut! Yep, that lil’ gem is so good I’ll say it again: THE TREE IS ALWAYS TALLER WHEN THE GRASS IS CUT! There’s a stereotype known and repeated around the world that Japanese/Asian men are small…you know, down there. But I contend that that may not really be the case at all! You’ll just have to trust me on this, I know! But it might (sometimes) just be a case of “not seeing the tree for the forest”! For my J-boys: 周りの草を刈った方が高く見える!

Resident Rockstar Extradordinaire Miss Marilyn has a wonderfully fabulous salon here in the City, called Boudoir. Ladies, if you’re not already up on your hygiene…. GET IN TO IT NOW!!! She’s abso -F-ing- lutely fabulous! Fellas, unfortunately, Miss Marilyn and her girls don’t do man-zilians! And I as helpful as I am, neither do it! LOL You’ll have to do it yourself!!!

Need help? All you need to know about man-scaping here!

“We Will ALL Be Migrant Workers”

Each day I get closer and closer to marking 4 years here on the archipelago, and as the last of my JET-set friends prepared to head home, I am increasingly asked the same question: “So when are you going home?” Truth is, I’ve been home at least a dozen times already, and most people already know that. So what they’re really asking is:  “When are you moving back?” After everything I’ve learned, after everything I’ve been through, the answer may just be “never”. That’s right! NEVER.

Don’t get me wrong! I miss the hell out my family and my friends and the fabulous, American-sized life I  had back in the States. There is a part of me that crazy as it sounds wants nothing more than to move back to T-town and live some fantasy life of “ordinary” (no disrespect). But for me, it remains just that… a fantasy. My life is waaaaay to ummm, “complicated” to make that dream a reality.

I tend to present my life as a Resident in the City Under Red Sun as something like enchanted. But in between all the boys, the trannies and the fabulous parties, there’s been some real rough patches here and there which I’ve also tried to document in the pages of this blog. So I’m certainly not here just because it’s easy. Nah, that ain’t it at all!

I’m here because I am an (aspiring) artist, and for me this is where I’m supposed to be developing my art. It’s about going where my work is. So I want to posit this as a concept, the idea that in the 21st century we must all be a sort of global migrant worker. OK, the term “migrant worker” has a lot of negative connotations associated with it. Maybe  the term, “emigrant” might be a lil’ less socially/ethnically charged. In any case, the idea is that we must all be willing and able to go wherever in the world it is that our job [read: our innate calling, whatever that is] demands that we go.

Just as the great freedom seeking artists of yesteryear ran off  to Paris. Just as singers flock to NYC today. Just as the aspiring actors [read: waitresses and bartenders] all wind up in LA. Just as ummm, God’s fabulous Children flock to Atlanta. So too, everybody  – yes, EVERYBODY! – is going to have to seriously consider moving, and to consider moving increasingly farther and farther away from the places of origin. Indeed, given the global flight of what were once purely domestic industries, many of us may even have to move overseas. This means that we’re all going to have to get up on our foreign languages and our knowledge of foreign cultures. That also means that we’re all going to have take an ACTIVE interest in what’s going on not only in our own communities but what’s going around the world. Our new neighbors just might be Sudanese refugees. Or who knows you might have to take that position in Dubai. These days, ya’ never know!

The world has changed. And the way we think about our “place” in that world must change with it. The question for everyone though is: Are you ready?

And, incidentally, while you’re thinking about that. Check my previous post on Japan’s  expediant plan to deal with unemployment in its South American nikkei community here: http://cityunderredsun.com/2009/04/03/you-can-go-home-now-thanks/

Anti-Herbivore Behaviour

While some men here in Land of the Rising Sun may have lost their lust for life, others have really come into their own…. like literally! A great example of anti-herbivorous behaviour, meet one Masanobu Sato, crowned last month in San Francisco’s 9th Annual Masturbate-A-Thon as the world champion masturbator after a record setting 9 hours 58 minutes of going at it! Wow, how does he find to the time? I mean 10 hours! Really, 10 hours?!?

Read the, errr, gripping interview with the champ himself.

I wrote a post and made a video about, you know, foreigners finding their super powers here in the City. It seems that natives too find their powers in the light of foreign suns…. Super powers indeed!

What Are Your Super Powers?

Continuing from the last post, we all have superpowers. Certainly, here in the City Under Red Sun I have mine…. but what are yours?

City Under Red Sun Revealed

I thought at some point I had written about why I titled this blog “City Under Red Sun”. And why I almost always refer to the City as such. Yesterday, one of my favorite residents Miss Mo’ asked me to explain the title, and it turns out though that maybe I hadn’t. So here it is (my super-secret inner otaku revealed):

According to the Superman myth, Kal-El was born on the planet Krypton. Under Krypton’s red sun, Rao, the beings of Krypton lived technologically advanced but otherwise unextraordinary lives. After the destruction of Krypton, Kal-El is sent to Earth, and here under Earth’s yellow sun he discovers he has the amazing superhuman abilities, including the ability to fly, the ability to see through walls, and the ability to easily lift super massive objects.

I maintain that I am no superhero. But under Japan’s red sun, it seems I (and all of the 外人 [gaijin: foreigners]) do have special, superhuman powers. While not quite as impressive as Kal-El’s, my abilities include the ability to fly and swim great distances (like across the Pacific), the ability to communicate in more than one language, the ability to safely consume the food of the Gods (i.e. natto and umeboshi) and not be killed instantly, and the ability to deftly use the sacred tools of the most ancients (read: chopsticks). In addition, I can shape-shift into Usher, Will Smith, Bobby Ologun, President Obama or some random Indian guy,  adopting their particular skills and abilities in the process. I can alter local gravity and focus all attention on me. I can create a shock wave and clear all native life within a 10 meter radius. And sometimes, quite unexpectedly, I can disappear altogether.

It’s like in the City Under Red Sun, I can be everything and nothing at all, all at the same time! And that’s how I came up with the title of this blog. And far from being just another blog about Japan, this here is an account of my amazing journey through a life less ordinary.

28 Days to Better Habits

I’ve come to the final conclusion that living in the City hasn’t been the best for my health – physically, mentally, spiritually and certainly not financially. Reading even a few of my posts is testament to that. With everything that’s happened in the past month or so, I’ve had to re-evaluate just what it is that I’m here in the City Under Red Sun yes, but in a much larger sense, what I’m doing here in this life.

It’s an ongoing process to be sure, but I am well on my way to answering those difficult questions. In the meantime, I’ve adopted (am adopting) some new habits to help me on the way. And here they are:

• Minimize my consumption of alcohol.
• Eat more health-consciously (less fat, sugar, red meat)
• Exercise regularly
• Devote more time to my academic studies
• Devote time to my spiritual growth
• Devote less time to trying to “get it in”
• Avoid meaningless sex
• Speak more fiercely from the Eye
• Focus more on the execution of my creative pursuits
• Live within a budget

It’s a pretty long list representing some drastic changes to the way I’ve lived my life over the past few years, particularly this past year here in the City. It’s amazing how having almost everything at your fingertips can drive a man crazy. But then again, maybe not! LOL

Most of the habits I’ve already started trying to do (with varying rates of success). It’s been about a week though since I’ve really got in to it. But if the old “28 Days to Better Habits” rule has any truth to it, I got about 3 weeks to go. When I do re-emerge from my self-imposed exile I will be that much more stronger and healthier. Here’s to living the life… and living it more abundantly!

Cheers {with a protein shake… hopefully}